If all, or even most people were sensible, kind, and somewhat intelligent, then I would agree with you. however, people are petty, venal, and small minded. Consider this, we have people who are not only ignorant, but take pride in it. My kids have a teacher who says he won't let his children learn a foreign language because "America is number one so why would they bother going to another country?". A teacher. And then you have people like Palin who consider those with educations elitist.
We have people who actually buy into the birther carp, in fact, more than half of people who identify themselves as republican are skeptical about the president's birthright.
Then consider how business operates. There are businesses that operate in a responsible manner, but most care more about profit than people. The idea that companies can self regulate responsibly is ridiculous.
And if you ask me, controlling someone's life entail, oh, maybe telling them they can't get married? Or that they aren't smart enough to determine if they should have an abortion or not? Or do an end run to try to prevent distribution of birth control? That's what the anti-planned parenthood stuff is. What could be more controlling than those things?
I really don't understand how you can say that conservatives don't want to control people. Do you think they want to give creationism equal time in schools because they want smarter kids, or because they want to control thought?